Picking up the Pieces…

It’s been almost 2 months since I last even looked at my blog.

I wasn’t going to even write this post, I was just going to jump back in, but I felt that there should be some explanation of where I’ve been.

And to sum it up; I fell apart in a BIG way right before Christmas.

I was being pulled in about 5 million directions and I SNAPPED. Everything was suffering, and I found myself having some pretty severe panic/anxiety attacks. I was crying at home, I was crying at work, I wasn’t sleeping, etc etc.

One morning I was planning on walking into work and quitting, effective immediately…and as I was putting on my jacket and grabbing my keys I had a moment of clarity and was like “Woah wait, what am I doing?! This is CRAZY..I love my job..maybe not today..but I LOVE my job..CALL THE DR instead!”. So I did, and by the afternoon, I was ready to start picking up the pieces.

It’s been about a month and a half since that visit, and I wish that I could say that I feel better..but I know that I am getting there. I look back at how it took a lot of help and medication to get through a visit to the passport office, or how it took TWO doses of anxiety meds just to get through a 5-hour shift at work, and then another to sleep through the night. It felt like every time I turned around something was triggering panic. But in the last week, I have only needed one! So I can see the progress and it makes me feel good! I managed to have 2 really strong days in a row where I kicked some serious butt cleaning and cooking and just being present. I felt human again.

So now, here I am…slowly getting back into the swing of things..to my ohmmade kinda life!

Still with me?

~ Christy

 

Dear Customer… (retail at Christmas)

a_harsh_word_image

Writing about things that hurt my heart are really hard for me. I don’t find words easily to begin with so sharing pain is infinitely harder.

I wasn’t going to even share this post to begin with because I have one of those “it was likely my fault anyways” souls..

So I’ll start by saying that I generally LOVE my job. I know the store like the back of my hand. I love talking with people about what they’re making, which many times involves how to get their idea from the pretty picture on pinterest into what they actually need, and then to what next. I LOVE to talk creative.

So yesterday, this customer was like every other “can you tell me where ____ is?” and I think of the different options that we may have and ask more questions so I can take her to just the right spot. Only, in this case, I was pretty sure that we didn’t have it…when you spend a full year doing this job, in a place where you and your kids LOVE to shop, there really isn’t much that stumps you! So I quickly asked on my walkie if anyone else had ideas..I had a manager quickly reply to me with the different options that were already in my head.

So I reply “No I’m sorry…” and tell her some of the options. BUT that was not enough. She made it very clear that NO she had purchased them in our store before and that we DO have them and that our answers are just not good enough. So this is where you’re smiling and saying I’m sorry and break away. You let it go, and continue on helping customers.

But then about 15 minutes later I hear a loud “Oh, it’s YOU!!! come over here!!” directed my way. She found what she came looking for and made it VERY clear, and loudly too, how she knew that they were here, and that I was wrong wrong wrong. So again you apologize profusely and break away. What else can you do?

And here is where it DOESN’T end. I’m sure 2 minutes later she has shaken it off with her “HA! I sure told her!” attitude….but not for me. You managed to break me down. A sales associate, during the very busy and stressful holiday season, who has been told over and over that they’re wrong, or has never been good enough. I may have had 70 happy and truly thankful customers in my hours before that, but now you have stripped that all away and left me in tears. Embarrassed that you spoke to me in front of other customers that way, making me look silly and inept. My boss’s advice was next time just be sickeningly cheerful, that is what would hurt them..and just shake it off..hey, it’s retail at christmas! BUT it’s many hours later, the next day even, and I am left dreading the day ahead. Questioning if I have the skin to make it through the next month and a half of this insanity when I am so apparently fragile-souled..?

But you..hooray..you found your $6 item and you sure told me.

Any advice? other than shake it off? or chin up?

How do you deal with crappy people telling you what you’ve heard for 35 years now…?

 

~Christy

Be Still…

Be Still Photography Quote

I was just looking back through some photos that I took on our trip to British Columbia in August..and this photo just begged to have a quote added to it! Hope that you like it 🙂 My BF is much better at remembering where exactly shots were taken, but it’s either Ucluelet or Tofino!

Getting back to an OHMmade kinda life..

OHMmadeLife Be Whole Not Perfect

When I started blogging back in 2010, it was part of a project 365 with a local mommy forum. It was to share a photo daily with the other participants of what was going on in our life that day..a peek in. A way to connect us in the busy-ness that is life with little ones. Yes, now we have instagram. lol.

Little did I know how these connections would branch out and take my blogging further and further…to blogging for books, to blogging for brands, to ambassadorships, to speaking on panel at a conference, etc etc. It was life changing.

But life does keep changing and evolving. Life change had me take a break in ’14. I tried to come back but it just wasn’t the same anymore, my heart and focus had changed. My old blog, Home of OHM, will be officially done in Nov ’15.

It’s time to go back to basics for me. To what excited me in the first place. To where I made my most meaningful connections. To writing and sharing, from the heart, life’s events, big or small…recipes, photography, crafting, wins or FAILS, just LIFE.

My readers have said that they love that my writing feels as though we’re talking on a couch with coffee in hand. There are pauses and breaks and just an easy comfortable style. No extra words. It’s just ME, and I plan on keeping it that way.

I do hope you’ll stick around and see what the future will bring.

 

~ Christy